Welcome to the World Autumn

Natasha and Gareth share their wonderful birth story of their daughter Autumn. This birth story is so inspiring and empowering – a true testament to the importance of investing time, money and energy into the birth experience you want and deserve.

'At 9pm on the Saturday night (9 days after my due date) my waters broke. My partner, Gareth, and I remained calm, quickly ate some food, bought the birth bag downstairs and pretty much just sat and waited. But nothing. Needless to say it was a huge anti climax. Sunday came around and I was advised to visit a midwife who, although very kind and understanding, informed me I had to book in for an induction if labour hadn’t started within 24 hours of my waters breaking due to the increased risks. I was gutted. This meant my whole birth plan of being at home for the majority of labour and then heading to Helston birthing pool would go straight out the window. After having a bit of cry, I was reminded by Gareth what Terri had told me. I have the power to say no, I don’t actually have to agree to anything I’m not comfortable with. My baby was happy and healthy, I was happy and healthy, why not just wait and see what happens over the next few days? I contacted my incredible midwife Shannon who reassured me I didn’t have to be induced and she was happy for me to wait, I also contact Terri who reassured me the risks are low and sent me various different articles to read. I felt informed, empowered and in control. I cancelled the induction and felt grateful that I had such incredible women supporting me in my decisions!

At 2.30am on Tuesday 13th October my surges started. I felt so excited; it had been a long wait and many hot curries, raspberry leaf tea and long walks later but I’m SO glad I waited for my little bubba to come when she was ready. I turned over to Gareth and told him my surges had started – he suggested we go back to sleep which we did. By 3.30am my surges were more intense. Gareth and I headed downstairs, put the fire on, fairy lights on, lit some candles and burnt some sage and palo santo. I listened to my hypnobirthing recordings from Terri and remembered the breathing techniques I learnt not only in my hypnobirthing classes but also in my pregnancy yoga classes with Michie. I was SO relaxed and felt so comfortable and safe at home. Gareth ran me a bath at around 9am and made me some food.

By 10am my surges were coming in fast so we called our midwife Shannon who came and assessed me at home. I was already 7cm dilated! I then had to make the decision to either stay at home or head to the birthing pool in Helston. We decided on the latter.

I cannot explain the joy I felt when I stepped into the pool. It was the first time in my pregnancy I actually felt weightless and so comfortable. I was so glad I made the decision to head to the birthing pool. The room was dimly lit, filled with fairy lights, inspiring birthing affirmations, and was just SO relaxing. We put my birthing playlist on and I concentrated on my breathing techniques I learnt from Terri. I found that the 4 in and 8 out worked best for me and being on all fours and squatting in the positions I learnt in my pregnancy yoga classes helped me really relax and open up.

The next few hours went by so quickly. We had asked my best friends and family to write us short letters or words of inspiration for Gareth to read to me during the birth. These letters were amazing, they gave me so much strength and I felt so much love. We were both in tears for the majority of the letters as we held each other I’ve never felt so loved and held in my whole life.

Then came the transition stage…Terri had talked about this in the course. The part where you completely doubt yourself and every decision you’ve ever made for your birth. I turned to Shannon and Gareth and told them I’m not doing this anymore, I can’t do it, I won’t do it and they have to take me straight to Truro. Both of them reassured me and reminded me that I was just experiencing the transition stage. I didn’t care; I wanted out, I wanted ALL the drugs. I remember thinking ‘why did I have to be a fucking hero and opt for this natural birth?!‘ BUT…this moment was short lived and it did pass! I don’t think Gareth would have reacted and dealt with me so calmly if we hadn’t learnt all of this on the course. I mean who’s going to argue with a fierce, roaring women mid child birth?! I can’t thank Gareth and Shannon enough for supporting me through that transition stage. I would have been SO unbelievably disappointed if I’d actually transferred to hospital due to a moment of self-doubt.

I can honestly say the actual birthing part of labour was so enjoyable. It felt so primal, so natural and this overwhelming feeling of euphoria came over me. As I noticed the surges change to downwards I turned to Gareth and said ‘I can feel her coming! We’re going to meet her soon!’ I loved this part, the breathing and actually working with my baby to breathe her out. At one point Shannon turned to me and said ‘Tash, reach around and feel her, her head is half way out!’ so I reached around and could feel this full head of hair! It was amazing! I laughed and cried all at the same time! Within minutes Autumn was born…the midwives told me to look down as she swam between my legs and I reached down and lifted her out of the water and onto my chest. Gareth and I held each other…we laughed, we cried and couldn’t stop looking at this amazing thing we had both created. I couldn’t believe she was finally here. It’s like a love you’ve never known.

Autumn was born at 5:06pm weighing 9lbs 9oz and a quarter! I had a small 2mm tear which didn’t need stitches. I did have to be transferred to hospital at around 7pm due to losing blood after the birth and I have to say everyone at Treliske were incredible. The nurses, midwives and doctors. It was such a positive experience and I can’t thank them enough.

I feel so grateful to Terri, my midwife Shannon and yoga teacher Michie. Without these incredible, badass women supporting me through my pregnancy and birth I doubt I would be writing this positive birth story today. I also feel so proud of my body – carrying my beautiful baby for 9 months and instinctively knowing how to birth her. And last but not least my partner Gareth. For being 100% involved in absolutely everything during the pregnancy and birth and respecting every single one of my pregnancy and birthing wishes. For loving and holding me through the birth, for being understanding and never leaving my side and for, most importantly during labour…feeding me ALL the jelly babies on demand.

Terri, I just wanted to say thank you so much for your amazing course and the support you gave us after too. I've been recommending you to all my friends, it's the best decision we made.’

If this sounds like birth that you dream of having, then get in touch. My Hypnobirthing courses really are a game changer. I have 1 space left on my November course (starting on the 1st November) and my January course dates are live on the website. I have 1 space left for a November private course, and 2 spaces remaining for private Hypnobirthing in December. Anywhere between 20 and 30 weeks is a great time to start. The earlier you start the more time you have to practice all the wonderful techniques you will learn. Email me on info@cornwallhypnobirthing.co.uk tor visit www.cornwallhypnobirthing.co.uk/book-online to grab a space. I can guarantee you wont regret it :)

Self Care is more than just a bubble bath!

I'm a little late to Mental Health Awareness Day, however I just wanted to share with you my thoughts on Self Care as self employed/small business owner, & what a difference it has made to my life over these past few months now that I am actively making sure I participate in it in the right way.

Firstly, this might be a controversial opinion but, I get really annoyed reading about self care suggestions such as "have a bath, drink a coffee, eat something nice, get a good nights sleep". Personally I don't think that's self care - I think that's a basic f*cking human right. Wash, drink, eat, sleep! That's basic care - like, the care minimum! The Google definition of Self Care is "the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one's own health" and "the practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress." So, let's cut the bullsh!t - having a bubble bath, eating a cake and trying to get 7 hours sleep is not self care, it's the minimum of what we need and deserve.

These past few months I've been practising self care in a different way; in a way that actually makes me feel good, puts myself first and protects my well-being. Previously I have been in the mindset of 'I'm too busy for that', or 'I can live without X,Y, Z' or 'that's not an essential' and something I'm terrible for 'business/child/relationship/etc comes first'. However through my coaching with Badass Birth and after reading Sarah Akwisombe 's book and listening to some Podcasts & Ted Talks, I have been making changes in the way I adopt self care. One of the biggest changes I've made is planning my down time & actually making it a priority. I used to hate seeing a blank page in my diary, it meant no work, & no work means no money. Where as now I make sure I have AT LEAST 2 blank days. I've come to realise that those days are so important. They are my days & are crucial for me to take care of myself.

I put myself first on those day. The biggest change - I say no WITHOUT GUILT to anything that I do not want to do on those days - even if it's my partner asking if I want to do something together. I spend money on myself - I'm not an extravagant person, in fact in the past I've actually been quite tight as I've always been counting the pennies - but now I'm buying myself lunch out, I'm visiting my osteopath more regularly, I invested in PT sessions with Kapow Healthy Living and I'm going to the gym 3x a week, I booked a massage, and subscribed to Audible, to list just a few things. Thanks to these changes I feel like I'm taking the best care of myself than I have in years. I completely understand that I'm a writing this from a place of privilege, however I urge anyone to look deeply in to their self care routine and really tune in to what you need and deserve. And I can tell you now - it's more than a bath and a cup of coffee!!

If you are thinking about booking a hypnobirthing course with me, bare in mind that my availability is limited, I only work 5 days a week, and my evening availability is even more restricted as I value my family time and down time. I will always do what I can to be accommodating and flexible, but get your Hypnobirthing and antenatal sessions booked in in advance to avoid disappointment. I only have one space remaining for private hypnobirthing course in November. Book now for December to get the dates you want.

I asked every question,I prodded them,I drilled them & when I was sure,I then asked for it to happen

Sometimes a birth journey takes a turn down an unplanned path; sometimes medical interventions are a wonderful, life saving necessity. This was one of those times. This beautifully written account of Otto's birth so inspiring, and perfect proof that Hypnobirthing is for ALL births, Doula support is for ALL births, and there is no right or wrong way to birth your baby - informed, safe and happy with your decisions are key.

Enjoy this read...

I remember the look on the waiters face that night when we ordered two hot curries. I laughed it off and asked for mine to be extra hot. We left the restaurant, laid the table at home, ate our curries and I climbed the stairs to watch some TV in bed whilst Chris continued to lay the new wooden floor in the sitting room. As I undressed and slipped into my slacks, a wave arrived, rolling through my body from top to toe but mostly wrapping its self round my abdomen. I was at the sink, clutched onto the side and smiled with joy. Then another, by this time I was on all fours, Chris had brought up the silver mixing bowl in case I wanted to be sick. I remember looking at it and it reminding me of my catering days, slightly annoyed that I wasn’t presented with the wooden or china one. He was speaking to the midwife, then he was speaking to Terri our Doula.

My surges were powerful, they were mine and my baby’s, we were talking in waves, out in the ocean on our birth journey. He spoke and I folded. I surrendered. I moved for him, in every direction he needed and wanted. Fast or slow, turning up and down our bodies merged, finally into one. I heated up and cooled down, I urinated in my car and collapsed on cushions to support him.

At the birth centre Terri looked like an angel, waiting for me and my baby. Open armed she took us and gently lay us down on pillows and blankets in the waiting room, humming and stroking my hair. Chris lay with me, obeying to every need. Touch my foot, water, hair, back, hand, hold me, stop holding me. My hind waters broke [merconium], so in the car we drove to the hospital, a bumpy back road of eternity, whilst surges forced though me, howling but still breathing the way we knew would keep us strong and safe. I fell into a wheel chair as the midwives took us all into a small room. I stopped dilating but the surges kept coming. Eventually after many hours I had an epidural, Chris tells me it was the moment he broke down as it took them a while and a few goes to get it right. I was oblivious. Terri held him and they carried on supporting me. I wanted a cheese and mayo sandwich but we only had Soreen. I urinated everywhere, again.

My baby was pushing against my cervix. He was at the wrong angle. His heart rate dropped suddenly and I could feel a little panic in the room from the staff. New surgeons arrived, we spoke of a c section. I asked every question, I prodded them, I drilled them and when I was sure, I then asked for it to happen. Papers were signed. Our little trio set up in theatre. I was numb from toe to just below my breasts. Anaesthetist to my left, Chris and Terri to my right. I shared old stories of my womanhood during strange abdominal sensations. Then there he was, held up in the air, almost tribal, our baby boy. I saw tears in Chris’s eyes as he came and rested his head on my shoulder as our baby lay on my breast. We did it. I did it.

The birth was not my envisaged plan of water and candles but it was mine and my baby’s, the way we moved down our journey, every wave and every calm moment, taking rest and gathering strength together. Our love and spirit engulfed our heart beats and oh when we held each other for the the first time, raw and naked, in our vibrating aura, our voices close to our ears, we sang and whispered all our loving words together.

My birth came with a sudden agony on day three, just when my hormones hit the roof, my c section ruptured whilst in hospital. Surgery again. Separation for my baby. This was a moment that would mark many consequences for his need to catch up to me, to be closer and closer as he developed. We lay together for months, sleeping together, feeding together, talking and playing closely until his little head looked over my shoulder and he asked to move a little. I gave him his space and his arms and legs stretched out and movement dawned on him. Today is his 10-month birthday, it’s 15:40, in an hours time he was birthing.

I want to thank you Otto, my baby boy, for being so brave and spectacular, for never showing fear or doubt, for always telling me what you wanted.

I want to thank you Chris, you gave me everything. Every level of my existence lent on you and you showered me with your unconditional love, positivity and sensitivity.

I want to thank you Terri, for being our angel, you flew in and spread your peace and love and held us all in your protected, safe cocoon.

I want to thank you Midwives and theatre staff, for helping the birth of our boy, for your clarity, transparency, calm and kind demure. And all the tea, toast and understanding in the 10 the days we spent with you in hospital.

Terri reminded Otto, Chris and I that we are humans. That we can breathe. That meditation is powerful. That believing in one’s self is the one and only strength we will ever need. She is right.